


The Gentle Devil

by junxouji



Series: The Gentle Devil [1]
Category: EXO (Band), K-pop
Genre: Alternate Universe - Angels & Demons, Alternate Universe - Slavery, Demons, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Insecurity, K-Pop - Freeform, Light Angst, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-18
Updated: 2014-11-18
Packaged: 2018-02-26 03:43:06
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,198
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2636726
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/junxouji/pseuds/junxouji
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It was a certain type of sadness in his eyes that was easily understood. It was the type of sadness you could easily fall in love with. It was the type of look you could only give when your body tells you everything is okay but your soul is screaming out for some type of spiritual awakening-- some type of nitroglycerin to make you feel alive. Even if only momentary.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Gentle Devil

**Author's Note:**

> Ahh, I am not sure this turned out as I wished! But once again grateful to those who made me work hard to complete it! Sorry for the formatting issues. Uploading here is always a trouble.

He was my God. He always had been.

 

It was a certain type of sadness in his eyes that was easily understood. It was the type of sadness you could easily fall in love with. It was the type of look you could only give when your body tells you everything is okay but your soul is screaming out for some type of spiritual awakening-- some type of nitroglycerin to make you feel alive. Even if only momentary. 

 

There becomes a point where it's humiliating to ask for help because you've always had a good life: a supportive family, a loving partner, a sweet home one could only dream of. But you're screaming at the top of your lungs only to be drowned by the waves of your circumstances. 

 

I dare say I loved him because I understood him. I understood his sad eyes but polite smiles. I understood his gentle touches but barbed tongue. I understood not being able to express or explain this type of loneliness. I understood waking every moment to a sun that never failed to shine and a heart that never ceased to ache.

 

And how I loved him.

 

* * *

 

    His fingers traced over the tan naked flesh. Sometimes it astounded Junmyeon how much Jongin seemed human but in moments his perfect became too dazzling and it slowly dawned on him the other was only a fragment of his desires.

 

He pressed a feather light kiss across the other’s chest, the man fast asleep, as Junmyeon quietly admired his eternal beauty. It was never just enough to have Jongin this way. Junmyeon liked to think he understood the demon better than anyone else. It was a certain type of sadness in his eyes that was easily understood. It was the type of sadness Junmyeon could easily fall in love with. It was the type of look Jongin could only give when his body was telling him everything is okay but Jongin’s soul is screaming out for some type of spiritual awakening-- some type of nitroglycerin to make him feel alive. Even if only momentary.

 

Jongin was the type of man to want love but it would be never be enough to keep him threading on the edge of sanity.

 

Junmyeon loved him because he understood Jongin. He understood his sad eyes but polite smiles. Junmyeon understood his gentle touches but barbed tongue. He understood not being able to express or explain that type of loneliness. He understood waking every moment to a sun that never failed to shine and a heart that never ceased to ache. He also understood Jongin would never openly love him as he wished; the demon had too many barriers in the way.

 

He understood Jongin was afraid of hanging his happiness and his heart on such a uncertain path as Junmyeon.

 

It was when Jongin stirred under his touch that Junmyeon dropped his hand that was tracing the contours of the other’s chest with a certain type of longing that was often mistaken for anguish. The demon’s warm hand covered his own and brought it up to his lips, pressing one tiny but firm kiss along the soft skin. It was moments when Jongin showed his sweetness that Junmyeon’s heart ached uncontrollably. When his chest spasms stopped, Junmyeon leaned up and pressed a kiss against the other’s lips. Jongin enjoyed being woken with a kiss-- sometimes, it was to the point if Junmyeon tried to leave the bed without kissing him the other wouldn’t let him go.

 

If Jongin wasn’t so afraid, Junmyeon had a feeling he could love him more than life itself.

 

Jongin’s fingers curled around the neck of Junmyeon, keeping his head in place and smiled faintly into the sweet kiss. “My little human grows sweeter by the day.” He whispered quietly as Junmyeon blushed faintly. How Jongin lived to see that blush.

 

“Your little human grows older by the day.” It was no secret even among the humans Junmyeon was quite old to be taken as a demon’s lover. He was in his mid-thirties though many would not guess. His face was smooth and pale, pretty and delicate looking. His gentle eyes, full pink lips, and sweet rosy cheeks often fooled many with his age. The halo of soft blonde hair was something Jongin adored greatly.

 

Jongin flashed a rare but small smile. His clawed fingers went to touch the soft cheek of his human lover. Jongin’s silvery eyes were unsettling to most but Junmyeon saw the warmth peeking out from the icy orbs. “You are blessed with the ability to age, my dear. It’s much more difficult to be frozen in an eternal state of youth when those you love grow older everyday.”

 

Junmyeon’s lashes fluttered shut as he arched towards Jongin’s hand, nuzzling his face against the smooth palm. “You do not have to remain forever as you are alone. You know I would give my mortality up for you.”

 

Trading his life for a life with Jongin seemed so trivial and small--

 

Jongin was quiet as he often was when Junmyeon brought up the subject of exchanging his soul for immortality to spend forevers with Jongin. He felt Jongin press one kiss across his temple and pull away knowing if he opened his eyes he would meet Jongin’s tight expression. “That is not something I am willing to take from you. I already steal your time, your love, and your body. I cannot ask for your soul.” It was always the same with Jongin. Protecting Junmyeon from himself.

 

“Then your poor human lover shall grow old and ugly.” Junmyeon muttered. But he knew that Jongin would still feel affectionately even if he was an old withered piece of dust. Jongin’s love was forever. Even if Jongin would never say the words to Junmyeon, he knew. He knew Jongin loved him. Though the demon had never told Junmyeon, he didn’t need to.

 

There were things that many didn’t know about immortality. And it wasn’t something Jongin could verbally express to a human like Junmyeon and expect him to understand. When once began immortal, it was like shedding away your humanity. An immortal could be surrounded by a million other people but feel alone. It took a lot to breathe as if air was dancing around you but out of your touch. It took a lot to touch, as if those you did touch were running away like wisps in the wind. To die but still live was a curse. Even with Junmyeon in his arms, Jongin felt as if Junmyeon was a galaxy away from him.

 

It would have been terribly selfish and cruel of Jongin to take away Junmyeon’s life simply so he would never have to exist without him. Jongin much preferred Junmyeon living a decent human life and ending his days as a mortal rather than a forever of misery.

 

Jongin desired Junmyeon. He desired him more than he had ever desired another person in his entire lifetime and his entire existence. It was a love that was more than love. It was a need. Junmyeon was his air. He was the darkness and the light. The sun and the moon. Water and fire. From his gentle beautiful smiles or the creases extending past his eyes from smiling too much. Anyone else could attempt to try to give Jongin the feelings Junmyeon did but, it wouldn’t be the same. It was like trying to live your life on the finest brand of wine: smooth, deep, and velvety. And then someone would try to imitate the flavor of love. Anyone else but Junmyeon would be a cheap and imitation that would never do the real thing justice.

 

If Junmyeon knew the extent of his feelings for him, Jongin was sure that the other would run from the intensity.

 

Jongin wanted to hold Junmyeon in his hand forever. It was more possessive in nature than Jongin let on. It was an obsession to the demon. Jongin wanted it all; so selfishly. He wanted Junmyeon’s smiles but he wanted his tears and pleas as well.

 

And it was the darkness lurking in the demon’s mind that made Jongin reluctant. He moved quietly knowing he had upset Junmyeon by refusing him again. The sheets fell from his chest as he sat up, pressing a gentle on Junmyeon’s shoulder.

 

The kiss lingered with a burning feeling. The thing about the undead and the living; they weren’t suppose to be together. Every kiss, every touch, every lingering contact of skin left a soft burning feeling that reminded them they weren’t suppose to be. But it grew to Jongin as a feeling of craziness. It made him crave more being the masochist he was. To relish the burn of the good and the desire he felt.

 

“This cannot last forever.” Junmyeon said finally and turned from Jongin moving to gather his clothing scattered across the demon’s chambers. “And when it ends, am I suppose to go back to the way it was before? I try to be patient with you. I try to be understanding.” He turned to Jongin, for once happiness not swimming in his eyes. There were unspoken words shared in their gazes: love was not enough. 

 

Jongin couldn’t ask him to stay. He’d hurt him sooner than later. He could only watch Junmyeon leave his room with a sickening feeling of heartthrob building in his chest. Had Jongin be anything but a demon, he might have had some hope with a future with the man he loved. But a demon’s hands were stained with death, pain and misery. It was his curse. It was his punishment for his life. And there was no way he’d even dare to ask Junmyeon to share that burden.

        Atlas must suffer alone.

 

    The world of the humans had ravaged by war of mankind. Eventually as many other worlds before them, the demons and angels lurking for power came forth. Powerless to defeat the invaders the humans submitted to the magical beings and became what many would consider second class citizens. Many were forced into servitude or as laborers. Junmyeon had gotten lucky. Born as a man with a beautiful face he was sold into slavery to a royal blood demon family. He was gifted to Jongin when he was a mere child. As he grew into the middle aged man he was now, Jongin remained the same as when Junmyeon had been a child.

 

    Jongin remained as he would always.

 

    It was no secret that the two lovers were disputing in the Kim manor. It was evident when Jongin had seeked his lover and been brushed past if he wasn’t there. Jongin wasn’t accustomed to being ignored by Junmyeon. Even, when he had angered Junmyeon greatly the other rarely ever showed his displeasure. When Jongin had finally found his lover in the library, he had slumped against the other, pressing a firm kiss to his neck to soothe the other’s mood. But Junmyeon had pushed him aside and walked out leaving both Jongin and the maids dusting bewildered.

 

    Though the two lived alone in Jongin’s large manor there were the families of human servants that cared for Jongin and the estate. Junmyeon once being a servant found it now awkward that he was in the position of their master’s lover. He knew eyes followed him, murmured whispers, and rumors spread through the manor when it was evident Jongin and he were in a dispute of sorts.

 

    Jongin was an affectionate creature, it was readily apparent something was amiss when Junmyeon refused to allow the other to touch him.

 

    Had Jongin been a more vain demon he might have beaten Junmyeon. But Junmyeon did not worry of his lover taking his frustration out on him. Jongin had always remained gentle in nature unless something did pose a threat to him.

 

    “It’s been three days you have deprived me of your presence.” Jongin finally said coming to his wits end at dinner one night. Junmyeon had joined him for dinner but spoke not a word the entire evening. “Will I ever know why you have suddenly found displeasure in me?”

    Junmyeon’s lips tightened and his eyes focused on the plate of steaming food before him. It was all of Junmyeon’s favorites-- which was no doubt Jongin’s work to subtly try to ease back into his good graces.

 

    Junmyeon sat down his fork and his eyes raised to meet Jongin’s. “What am I to you?” He asked.

 

    “I beg your pardon?” He asked, “What do you mean? You’re everything to me.”

 

    “Fifty years from now when I’m struggling to walk and breathe on my own, what will you do?” Junmyeon asked, “It won’t be always this way. Will you ever marry? What of me? Will you tire of me?”

 

    Jongin paused. “Are these questions coming from the fact I will not make you immortal?” He asked, “Junmyeon, no matter how young or old you are it will matter little to me. I will never tire of you. Nor do I have any desire to marry anyone besides you.”

 

    Junmyeon’s eyes narrowed. “We cannot stay this way.”

 

    “And why can’t we?” Jongin demanded, “This is the problems with human thinking. You assume there is always more than what is presence at that moment. We can continue the way we always have. Do you want me to marry you? Do you know how useless those titles are? I care for you. That’s all the should matter.”

 

    “It’s not enough to care!” Junmyeon said. “I don’t want to live myself next to someone with the emotional range of a vegetable. I need to be reassured. I need to be told. Do you know how insecure I feel? How unhappy the thought of being eighty is by your side? The future holds fear not, hope-- that’s the problem.”

 

    “And what is it you want me to do? Because caring is all I’ve got.” Jongin’s words were colder than usual and Junmyeon knew he had hurt him. But he couldn’t seem to control his words.

 

    “There are days Jongin when I want you to take my breath away. To reassure my fickle insecure human mind that I’m the most important person to you. There are days when I threaten to leave you I want you to get angry, to shout, to scream, to cry-- anything other than your calm indifference. And God, how I want you to think about something other than me by your side momentarily. Can’t you consider forever?”

 

    “Junmyeon, I am a demon. My mind doesn’t work like a human’s. If you want those petty human reactions then find yourself a human lover.”

 

    Junmyeon’s hand slammed down on the table. “No!” He snapped, “It’s things like that, that hurt! How can you suggest me find another as if you do not care?”

 

    “You’ve made up your mind to be angry with me from the beginning! I doubt anything I will say will matter much you stubborn creature.”

 

    Junmyeon was tired and he wasn’t sure what he was tired of. Maybe Jongin truly didn’t understand. They shared the same universe but their own worlds too far apart to be compatible. He sighed pressing his face into his hands. “I want to be young and beautiful for you forever.” Junmyeon said, “I know you have resistance. I know you feel guilt already. But I love you and I don’t care what I have to give to you. I just need nights where you don’t tell me you love me by kisses but with words. I need days where I don’t have to think of you as some unreachable dream. I need you to need me so much you think selfishly of me.”

 

    Jongin eyes narrowed. One minute Junmyeon was in his seat across the table and another he was in Jongin’s lap. His head spun slightly with whiplash. Jongin very rarely used his magic. But he couldn’t bare the inches separating him.

 

    “There are things you ask of me that I do not know if I can give.” Jongin admitted his fingers dancing up Junmyeon’s back and the other cupping the shorter man’s cheek. “If I do all that you ask me of me I am afraid one day it’ll become too much for you. That I’ll cling to you so desperately you’ll see my faults. That I will squeeze too hard and you’ll turn to dust in my hands.”

 

    “I’d give it all so long you love me.” Junmyeon replied his hand covering Jongin’s on his face, his fingers pressed to the warm flesh making his skin tingle.

 

    “I do.. love you.” Jongin managed. “I do. I l-love you more than anyone. You are the most important person to me. And it’s frightening to think I cannot always make you smile.” His fingers wrapped around the back of Junmyeon’s neck lowering his face closer to his own. He pressed a gentle kiss on his watery eyed lover. “If I give you everything you want from me, I’d never let you go. You’d be tied by my side. If I was truly selfish with you, it would become an obsession.” 

 

    “Then drive yourself crazy with me, Jongin.” Junmyeon said quietly, “Madly love me if you need to. Color me in your presence. You don’t need to tame yourself. I know you better than anyone. I know about the flaws you attempt to hide. I accept them. I love you for them.”

 

    “You deserve more than I am.” Jongin muttered, his face pressing into Junmyeon’s neck, planting a kiss on the pale hollow of his neck.

 

    “It should be up to me who I do and do not deserve. You give me so much with little I can offer in return.” Junmyeon ran his fingers through the dark hair of his lover. “You’ve been there for me ever since I was a kid. I remember the days I would cry and you’d take me in your arms. You’d sing me to sleep when I was afraid of storms. You slept by my side when the darkness threatened to swallow me up. You’re so patient. I’d wish you’d see the good in yourself.”

 

    “I am a demon. The only good in me is the reflection in my eyes. It’s only you who is truly good.” Jongin said. “No matter how far you go from me, I will be behind you. Junmyeon I cannot let you go even if I tried.” He lifted his face and his soft demonic grey eyes stared at Junmyeon. There was the guilt coursing through his skin that made him regretful for his earlier harsh words. Junmyeon smiled sadly, pressing his lips to the other. How much he adored him. How much he loved him. “I’ll give you immortality but I will smother you in myself. So learn quickly to breathe me in.”

 

    Junmyeon smiled. He shook his head. “I’ve been breathing in your love since I met you. Didn’t you know? You’re what I survive on. My substance.” In the end, Junmyeon was a goner. Jongin was the one who only ever mattered. Little did he know, that Jongin returned the feelings.

 


End file.
